I am awesome now

The problem with youth is that it comes bundled with ignorance and insecurities. It takes years to declutter yourself, to rinse and strain all the shit, all the roles and expectations society imposed on every one of us by default. People want you to become the posterchild of whatever inane trend-of-being is currently considered cool. To be awesome you just have to don’t give a fuck. It’s hard work to not care. Most of us just ride the merry-go-round with them sheeps. Cause that way you don’t have to deal with your own decisions; decisions that may be retarded and prove yourself as an indisputable turd. But you will be a turd of your own and you will live your own particular brand of turdness. Living that way tickles. All the time. It feels awesome to be awesome. And you feel a shitstorm inside you when you betray yourself, that in reality it is, tee-hee, constantly happening. You learn to escape the stage and you learn to take a vow. You learn that awesomeness is not a constant but a pulsating stage. Sometimes blackholish and sometimes supernova. But you don’t know that when you’re young. So you stay a wanker and piss it all until your prime is long gone. Is “youth wasted on the young”? Not wasted but underenjoyed. The young doesn’t take the time to taste a sip of water, they want to ride the tsunami. They’re not sex, they’re cum shots. Of course, all of this might seem like an old fart’s rant, a word-wielding has-been jealously judging from the last row. But I know. I know how it feels and I know you’ve felt it too. And sometimes, if not always, you think like me. Given the chance and, boy, I would take it, as I am now, I would make an awesome teen. I would supernova that shit to oblivion.